Should men be gagged, tied up, and forced to take paternity leave? Maybe so—if women are to have any shot at career success and true equality.
"They need to discover how wonderful it is to spend time with their new baby," says a female associate at a Wall Street firm. "And if you really want them to take equal responsibility at home, fathers should get the same paid leave as new moms."
You might think it's too radical/intrusive/ridiculous to give fathers the same leave benefits as mothers who go through pregnancy and childbirth. But it would certainly send a signal that child rearing is (or should be) a joint endeavor and not the primary domain of women. (Paid parental leave for both sexes is now common in Big Law, though men generally don't get the same paid 12 weeks or so that's now typically offered to women.)
But what red-blooded male would risk the stigma of taking parental leave? Wouldn't they be worried about being perceived as career wimps—particularly in a give-it-your-all profession like law?
To push more men to take paternity leave, some European countries are implementing aggressive policies. Writes Catherine Rampell for The New York Times:
Countries like Sweden and Norway have recently introduced a quota of paid parental leave available only to fathers. If dads don’t take it, they’re leaving money on the table. In Germany and Portugal, moms get bonus weeks of maternity leave if their husbands take a minimum amount of paternity leave.
And the upshot: These countries are seeing "gigantic increases in the share of fathers who go on leave," says the NYT. More significant, traditional gender roles are changing as a result.
Citing a new Cornell University study about the long-term effect of Quebec's paid paternity policies on gender patterns, the NYT reports:
Several years after being exposed to the reform, fathers spent more time in child care and domestic work—particularly “time-inflexible” chores, like cooking, that cut into working hours—than fathers who weren’t exposed to the reform. More important, mothers spent considerably more time at work growing their careers and contributing more to the economy, all without any public mandates or shaming.
Will American firms and corporations follow suit? Don't hold your breath. (Remember, only 16 percent of employers in the United States offer paid maternity leave. So in that context, big-firm lawyers are the fortunate ones.)
All of this raises the question of whether official policy can alter behavior. Is giving both sexes the same rights and responsibilities to care for a new child the key to achieving gender equality in the workplace and at home? Or are gender roles so ingrained that women with kids will still bow out no matter which policies are implemented?
Related posts: Men on Leave Are Slackers at Home; Do Men Give a Hoot about Work life Balance?
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I feel so badly for my husband right now. We only recently found out that his option of paternity leave is unpaid. This has pushed him to work over time in an attempt to budget so that he can manage a week or two off with our newborn. I understand that maybe paternity leave is not for every man, but for those men who have eagerly looked forward to being a parent they should be given every opportunity to be there for their family. I believe that younger men have stepped out from behind image of 1950's distant father, and many want to actively participate in their children's lives from the very beginning. Why should they be discouraged from that?
Posted by: Laurie | June 19, 2013 at 02:39 PM
You really went right to the heart of the issues when you posed the issue " whether official policy can alter behavior. Is giving both sexes the same rights and responsibilities to care for a new child the key to achieving gender equality in the workplace and at home?". Where do our individual freedoms coincide (or clash) with mandates in the workplace? Our American culture is different from Europe, so to be effective I believe it would take decades to change our mindset. Possible, but not probable anytime soon.
Posted by: Diane Rifkin | April 14, 2013 at 10:35 AM
This article and the comments are a vivid demonstration of why feminism is completely at odds with individual freedom and will inevitably lead to totalitarianism.
I have an idea: lets start this experiment by requiring the policy at women-owned businesses (real women-owned businesses, not just businesses that have womens' names on them to qualify for special loans and programs or because the husband has judgments against him).
Posted by: DirkJohanson | April 11, 2013 at 11:39 AM
Paid paternity leave is a great start. Here's the truth. There’s a lot of work at home that needs to be done and somebody has to do it. There are generations of precedent suggesting that it's the woman's responsibility and we need to change the paradigm and change the mentality of men and women about what constitutes "women's work". It's also great for the kids who develop stronger relationships with their fathers.
Posted by: Chaton | April 10, 2013 at 11:29 AM
Brilliant!
Posted by: Eve Birnbaum | April 10, 2013 at 08:24 AM